This Calling
by kuteluver
Summary: Naruto is cutting to escape the pain of this world. Will he do it? No Pairing.
1. My Pain

Hey everyone. I'm feeling quite down and miserable at the moment. So I decided I need an outlet. Here is a one-shot I thought of to help me out of my rut.

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This Calling

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Naruto sits in his room, gazing at the moon hanging high in the sky. He looks over at his desk and sees the kunai that has been his best friend for the past few years; giving him a sense of relief and a sense of living. For years now, Naruto had been cutting when he realized how much he was hated and how he would never be good enough for anything. Everyday Naruto would come home and cut himself. Some days it was worse. On those said days Naruto would cut himself 5-8 times in that one day. Today had been especially bad.

Flashback

_Team 7 met at the bridge and had been waiting for about 2 and a half hours now. _

''_When is that lazy sensei of ours going to show up?!" Naruto yells._

"_Naruto, shut up. We all know and all are upset by this. You yelling about it don't make it any better," Sakura venomously spits at him. _

"_But Sakura-chan," Naruto began again, still in a very loud voice. _

"_Dobe, shut the fuck up. We heard you already." Sasuke says, from where he is leaning on the bridge. _

"_Teme, don't-" Naruto began yet again only to be punched in the head by Sakura. _

"_Naruto you are a dobe. Why don't you just go away? It's obvious that we don't want you around." Sakura says._

"_Oh, I see," Naruto says in an unnaturally quiet voice. _

_Just as Naruto was about to walk away, Kakashi poofs in front of him, "Yo,"_

"_YOU'RE LATE!!!" Sakura screams at him. Kakashi looks around for the second voice that usually is accompanied by the first. He sees Naruto looking at the ground, bangs covering his eyes. _

"_OK, today we have a mission."_

'I can't let them see anything. I must hide it until I get home,_' Naruto tells himself. _

"_Is it a rank A mission? Or a rank S?" Naruto says, putting his mask back on._

"_Nope, rank D; Today we have to help an old lady round up her bulls," Kakashi says with what they think is a smile._

"_Uhhh, sensei, isn't that a little dangerous?" Sakura asks, well aware that bulls react to the color red._

"_Anyway, we will meet here in half an hour. Make sure to prepare yourselves." With that said Kakashi vanishes, leaving one of his students seething. _

"_Stupid sensei," Sakura says, walking away._

"_Hey Dobe," Sasuke begins, noticing Naruto's behavior from before. _

"_Hey Teme, I'll see you in a little while." Naruto takes off at a run, jumping on rooftops all the way to his house; leaving Sasuke standing there slightly confused. _

_Naruto enters his house and runs to his room throwing off his orange jacket and grabbing his favorite kunai. He cuts his left forearm. He relishes in the pain before Kyuubi heals it a minute later. He cuts himself again in the same place even deeper than before knowing that he would feel the pain a little longer than the cut before it. Five minutes later, the cut heals, leaving a pink scar. He gets up, grabs his jacket, and heads out the door. _

End Flashback

Naruto looks out the window again, remember how he had been chased by all the bulls because of the red swirl on the back of his jacket. Sakura had once again berated him for being such an idiot and wearing red. However, if it wasn't for him wearing that red swirl, they all would have been struggling with the bulls all day. By him wearing the red he caught all the attention of the bulls and he made them chase him into the bull pen before taking off his jacket, without thinking and leaving it in the bull pen so the bulls wouldn't break through the wooden fence.

Flashback

_Naruto jumps over the fence, throwing his jacket back into the pen. _

"_Hey Dobe, that wasn't a bad ide-," Sasuke looks at Naruto's arms. "Naruto, what is that?"_

_Naruto looks at where Sasuke is looking, 'SHIT!' he thinks._

"_Hehehe, these are from missions. I'm sure you have just as many scars too." Naruto explains. _

"_I'm not a dobe nor as careless as you, so no, I do not have that many scars" Sasuke says and turns away._

'_Wow, I think he bought it.' Naruto sighs in relief._

"_And dobe, don't you dare let me find out you are cutting yourself." Sasuke says, with his back still turned._

End flashback

'I can't take this anymore. I'm worthless. I'm such a screw-up. I can't do anything right. Nobody notices me. Nobody listens to me. Nobody pays me any attention. Everybody hates me. I'm so lonely. I can't keep up this façade.' He sits there thinking for a little while longer. 'I will end it tonight. I will take my life and everyone will be happier.'

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An hour later, Naruto still is unable to make himself bleed for longer than ten minutes. No matter how deep the cut, Kyuubi would just heal it again. However, Naruto notices it was taking a little longer to heal his self inflicted wounds.

'I'm going through this the wrong way. Instead of cutting horizontally, I could cut vertically; along the veins.' Naruto pulls the kunai point from his elbow to his palm of his left forearm. He enjoys the feeling and the sight of his blood as pours down onto his floor. He begins to feel Kyuubi healing and in a desperation he cuts himself another three times on the same arm. He switches the kunai to his other hand and does the same to his right arm five times. He feels lightheaded and falls forward, right into the darkness, with one last thought crossing his mind:

'I'm free.'

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I'm considering making this longer. If enough people review for a continuation then I'll oblige.

Review Please.


	2. NOTE

To the person who was too scared to actually leave their real name, nice message. If you don't like the story, then why did you read it. This was a story to vent some feelings. Obviously your life is so perfect you know what's right. How about this, stop being a loser by leaving such horrible reviews. If you don't like it, THEN DON'T READ IT!

But I will say thank you. Because you have pissed me off I will continue to write, and still use this as a way to express MY FEELINGS of joy, sadness and anger. So F you right back.

Sorry to all my readers who thought this was an update. I appreciate all you comments and improvements and even flames. But i will not stand for stupidity. Please if you leave me a message, as a sensible person, tell me what you like and didn't like and if you can suggest any improvements, I would greatly appreciate it.

So to all my readers, thank you for all of the years of support. I promise to update within a couple of days. And to the jackass, get a life.


	3. Chapter 2

Sasuke sits on top of his house mesmerized at the sight of the moon as it bathes the village in a silvery glow. He begins to recall the events of the day and the shocking assumption of Naruto potentially cutting himself. Sasuke begins remembering the night Itachi destroyed the Uchiha clan, as it was on a night just like this one; not a cloud in the sky and stars surrounding the moon high in the sky.

Sasuke remembers the days when he was so depressed he considered cutting himself. He was always too afraid to actually do it. He would sit in the basement, where it dark with the exception of 1 lone light bulb, with liquor bottles surrounding him. Sasuke never let anyone know, but he was already a heavy drinker, always trying to drink away his past and memories.

One day, after a very rough mission, he began to again relive that night his clan was murdered. He went downstairs, took out very strong vodka and took a few gulps. Already beginning to feel a bit tipsy, he slowly begins to sit on the floor and pulls out a kunai. Sasuke sets it above his wrist and hesitates a few inches above the skin. Beginning to feel his nerve leave him, he takes a few more gulps of vodka, trying to get to oblivion. Beginning to feel his courage come back, he takes the kunai and lifts it to stab his wrist. As he swings downward, the doorbell rings as the kunai is a few millimeters above his skin. Frustrated, Sasuke flings the kunai at the wall and watches it get stuck in a wooden stud in the wall. The doorbell rings again and Sasuke heads upstairs. To his surprise it was Naruto.

Flashback

_"Dobe? What are you doing here?"_

_"I wanted to ask you something," Naruto hesitates._

_"Well, Dobe, what do you want? Spit it out"_

_"I wanted to ask you if you wanted to spar with me. Since we don't have a mission today. It's been a while since just you and I sparred."_

_Sasuke looks at Naruto with a widened eyes._

_"Dobe, it's called a day off for a reason. And besides, as for why we haven't sparred in a while, it's because you always lose and aren't much of a sparring partner. I never get a work out with you. Don't ever come back." Sasuke slams the door in Naruto's face._

_Sasuke walks back downstairs, sits on the floor for a while taking an occasional swig of vodka._

_"I was too harsh on him. Maybe it would be good to go sparring." _

_Sasuke heads back upstairs, leaving his bottle downstairs and leaves his house. 'It hasn't been that long since Naruto left. Maybe he went to the training grounds.' _

_Sasuke makes his way there to find the grounds empty and bear. 'I guess I can try his house' Sasuke turns and heads toward Naruto's house. Upon arriving, he knocks for 10 minutes and receives no answer. 'Oh well. Maybe he found someone else. I'll just go back home to my bottles.'_

End Flashback

Sasuke picks up the bottle of vodka sitting beside him and takes a long drink, downing the alcohol.

Suddenly Sasuke feels a chill overcome him and sense of foreboding. 'What is the feeling? My chest feels tight. Something is not right. It can't be…' Sasuke drops his bottle and runs/leaps to his destination.

"I knew it. Why are you doing this?" Sasuke asks himself as he looks at the person responsible for his foreboding feeling.

"What do you want Itachi?!"


End file.
